Understanding Behaviour: Where to start with "Meltdowns"? Helping your Autistic child?

Behaviour can present in so many different ways. Within this blog we share more about behaviour and how to start helping your Autistic child.

Behaviour can present in many different ways, including "Meltdowns" with a screaming child, kicking, hitting out, running away or hiding. 

With a typical "traditional parenting" response, we may see a child being "told off" "punished" "items removed" for the behaviours continuing, a child being "sent to their room" if at home. The list can go on! 

Behaviour "Meltdowns" can trigger parents to respond in a certain way, due to:

  • Behaviours being taken personally
  • Questioning parenting
  • Triggers parental guilt
  • A parent may feel the child is intentionally being dis respectful
  • As a parent they may feel stressed or irritated
  • A parent may feel the child should "know better"
  • A parent may feel a lack of control in the situation
  • A parent has an unidentified need at the time: hunger, tiredness etc
  • The child's big reactions can trigger the parents anxiety
  • A parent didn't realise the behaviour was their way of communicating. 

Typical, "Traditional parenting" responses "don't" work with our Autistic or Neurodiverse children, because the behaviour, the "Meltdown" is a symptom of an unmet need. Beneath every behaviour there is a feeling. Beneath every feeling there is a need. Behaviour is our childrens way of communicating a stress response, and unmet need.


Where do we start with helping your Autistic child with "Meltdowns"? 

"Autism Acceptance Week" and "World Autism Day", are great times to learn a little more about behaviour and understand "why" behaviours occur. 

When we, as parents know "why" behaviours occur, as a parent we can understand that a child has an unmet need and adjust parental responses from "a child is performing the behaviour on purpose and being dis respectful" to "supporting" a child and helping them through the difficulties they may be experiencing, and meeting the unmet need. 

Helping your Autistic child with "Meltdowns", starts with understanding behaviour. 

Many Autistic children prefer repetition, sameness and routines of implementing activities, hobbies, mealtimes and bedtimes as a way of regulating, understanding feelings, emotions and providing comfort in everyday life. 

Overwhelm can occur, either internally within the body or externally outside of the body, with changes in routines, increased demands or expectations and more. During overwhelming feelings, children may not be feeling safe within their body or their environment. Many Autistic children can struggle to communicate or even understand the difficulties they are experiencing. 

Children need the support and understanding from an adult or parent to mirror "their" responses, and work together, in regulating emotions and feelings. 

Do you know where to start in understanding behaviour and working together with your child to regulate their feelings and emotions? 

Family life is often busy. It can be difficult to fit in, daily routines with different family members, clubs, events, nursery, school, college, and work. Thinking about how you may be feeling can be seen as "another thing to do". 

However, you are important, we can start by thinking about: 

  • What may be triggering for you and your child?
As a parent, you really are important and more than enough for your child. If you have little or no time to think, to recharge, each day, it can be difficult to then work together "with" your child, to help regulate their feelings and emotions.

What do you do at the moment for "yourself"?

 At Clear Steps Consultancy we appreciate how important parents and the family are. We also appreciate time is limited. We want to help you and we can!
We have put together a range of useful resources and step by step approaches, to help you as a family. 

We appreciate that behaviour difficulties can be all consuming. If its all too much at the moment, and you would like to speak to Clear Steps direct, feel free to message us, via our website clicking onto the "contact us" button and arranging a one to one call.

If you are ready to make the first step we have the following available to help and recommend: 
  1. Ruling out any underlying physical health care or medical needs. Do you know your child's poo type? or poo pattern? Poo can impact upon our childrens behaviour. Read more about poo and how to help your child within our latest blog post: Do you know your child poo type? or visit our website: www.clearstepsconsultancy.co.uk (Blog) 
  2. Understand "why" behaviours occur further, through downloading our Free information. Click here to download your FREE copy today: Understanding Behaviour

3. Joining us for a LIVE, low cost session and an opportunity to ask any questions you may have: Understanding Behaviour LIVE session. Understanding Behaviour shares how the brain, body reacts and shares helpful tips that can be implemented straight away to help your child and family.

4. For a one to one, individual approach, support is available through a Parenting Support Package. Contact us, via the website to arrange your one to one support approach: www.clearstepsconsultancy.co.uk 

    How can Clear Steps Consultancy help you further with Behaviour?

    Charmaine, at Clear Steps Consultancy supports children with and without a diagnosis, additional needs, their families, schools, organisations, charities and professionals in progressing and being successful with Toileting, Sleeping and Understanding Behaviour.  Support available to help with Behaviour, is as individual as the children, families and schools themselves, from online support to one to one Parenting Support Packages to Comprehensive assessments.

    Charmaine, helps children progress with behaviour, through the FREE Download Understanding BehaviourLIVE Family Support & Information SessionsParenting Support Packages, Comprehensive Behaviour Assessment Packages and within the Autism Before & After Diagnosis Webinar: Webinar link visit our website www.clearstepsconsultancy.co.uk to find out more 

    Help and support really is available!

    Start helping your Autistic child, by understanding behaviour today!

      What next:
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